Gifts and women in ministry

Here's a question I'd never thought/heard about till very recently - is it appropriate for a woman to lead worship in a congregation of both men and women?

People often have quite strong views about women preaching or being pastors, but what about things like leading worship?

On reading the passage below, I think that if God has given us a particular gift and it brings glory to Him when we use it then we should be using it if He provides opportunities for us to do so.

'Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms. If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen'. 1 Peter 4:10-12

But recently I read some info about women's role in the church, and a reference to

1 Timothy 2:11-12: 'A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. I do not permit a woman to teach or to assume authority over a man; she must be quiet.' How does this apply in the context of leading worship in today's culture?

God's Spirit reveals our own brokenness

so that God can restore us.

A friend has been reading 'Broken Down House' by Paul David Trip and suggested I read a particular chapter she's just finished. Really enjoyed it, keen to read the rest of the book!

Found this brief video of Paul sharing a bit about the book.

He's already at work

'For I have come down from heaven, not to do my own will, but the will of Him who sent Me.' John 6:38

What does God want me to do? Should I continue with a particular ministry? There are so many decisions to be made on an ongoing basis. Sometimes making these decisions is tough and confusing.

Yesterday I went to a 'mission shaped evangelism' seminar and John North shared some great thoughts about letting Jesus minister to others through us right where we are, right now. I realised I've often been so caught up in thinking where God wants me next that I miss opportunities He has for me right now. John explained that where we are right now is right where God wants us to be - where we've living, the people we're in relationship with, the activities we're involved with - and that God is already at work in the lives of these people and He wants us to join Him in what He's already doing.

John also suggested that at times we can come up with our own ideas in ministry and ask God to bless our great idea, instead of looking at where He's already at work and being a part of what He's already doing. It occurred to me that there's a particular idea I had in my life and have been wanting God to 'bless', all the while He's been asking me to let go of my idea, and let Him show me His idea, when He's ready to show me. John suggested three simple steps in thinking through what we should do - reading the Bible, prayer (prayer that listens!), and a commitment to be obedient.

I'm really glad I was able to go along yesterday, to be reminded of God's sovereignty, and to be encouraged to relax in His will where He's put me right now.

Truth vs Feelings

If you've read any of my blogs, you'll most likely have seen that I have a tendency to think with my heart first. I'm an F in Myers-Briggs.

A few weeks ago our Pastor spoke of the importance of listening to God's truth in the Bible, as opposed to our feelings. This is something my Dad often tells me, but I usually rebel when he tells me - my pride gets the better of me and I just wish he'd leave me alone. When the pastor said it, I was more accepting of it, and I've been sitting on it for a few weeks and thinking more about it here and there.

My feelings scream all sorts of negative messages, and as I listen to them I worry and they become overwhelming. But when I finally challenge my feelings and look to God and His Word, he helps transform my thinking, to put my 'problems' in perspective, to remind me of His promises, of His undeserved grace and of His promise to guide my steps if I trust Him with all my heart and stop leaning on my own understanding (Proverbs 3:5-6).

Aagh, such a struggle. To listen to the truth rather than my feelings.

One at a time... or lots?

In Henry Cloud's book, 'How to get a date worth keeping', he recommends not 'dating' one person exclusively so as to enhance your opportunities of getting to know different types of people, and learning about your own behaviours and ideas. He recommends dating lots of people at once.

I guess it kind of depends on your view of 'dating' too, but I'm not really keen on the idea! It does seem kind of flirtatious to me, though I suppose there's nothing wrong with getting to know more than one person at a time - it's probably the dating context that worries me. I'm pretty sure I won't ever have to deal with this issue myself anyway, but what do people think about this idea?

It's linked to his view that dating is not about marriage, which I'm not entirely sure about either. Part of me says it's great for a guy and a girl to just get to know each other and have fun together (which in my mind may not necessarily be classified as dating, maybe 'catching up'? ;), but the other part of me says it's not fair to keep doing this with someone if you don't intend to at least consider a serious relationship (and eventually marriage) down the track.

Something Henry does cover which I agree is really important, based on my personal experience, is accountability. He suggests having a dating accountability team who you talk to about your dating experiences and get to 'vet' anyone you're growing to like. Trusted friends who will be honest and help you identify your weaknesses in a loving way, and encourage you to grow, and pray with and for you, are invaluable in life generally, and as Henry suggests, when it comes to dating.

Here are a couple of quotes I found helpful in the book:

'Dating is about getting to know a person, sharing, talking, doing things together, and exploring spiritual matters - and that is what friends do. So, in a sense, every relationship should begin there.' p218

'People who are good for you are going to have a threefold effect over time:

1. You end up closer to God...

2. You end up closer to others...

3. You become more of yourself.' p225-226

'Lose your idol to receive what God has for you. 'Seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well' (Matt 6:33).' p208

Steps towards growth?

In Cloud's book, 'How to get a date worth keeping', he suggests undertaking an assignment to review your current interactions with people of the opposite sex, so that you can then make any necessary changes. I'm kind of keen to do the 'assignment' as he suggests it will help identify issues within ourselves that we can then work on so we can improve our interactions with people of the opposite sex. But I'm not sure if that's then suggesting that it's all up to me? I guess maybe it's not, maybe it's seeing the part I play in God's overall plan?

Anyway, Cloud writes (p52):

'God Himself will guide you into the next step of growth in your relational life, if you ask Him. When you ask Him how you need to change, God will bring you the wisdom and the circumstances that will help, and then you have to persevere in taking action.'

Reading books about these sorts of issues makes me realise the importance of seeking God's wisdom. It'd be great if God made these issues a little clearer and less grey in the Bible!

^{James 1: 4-6} Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. ⁵ If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.

Anticlimax

So I got hooked reading Elisabeth Elliot's Passion & Purity, and decided to read it before finishing Cloud's book. I was disappointed when I got to the end of the book - it just kind of ended. Not sure what I was expecting, but it was a bit of an anticlimax. Found some of their letters pretty surprising, especially one Jim wrote to her when they were engaged - perhaps 'fondling' meant something different to them than what comes to mind when I hear the word?!

What I appreciated about the book is that Elisabeth continually emphasises the importance of trusting God, even when we don't understand, of seeking Him first, and of surrendering everything to Him.

Clogged with wishes

'I was wishing that my wishes were what God wished, and if my wishes were not what God wished, I wished that I could wish that my wishes would go away, but the wishes were still there.'

Passion and Purity (p47), Elisabeth Elliot

Something's missing

Since talking through some of the stuff I've been reading in 'How to get a date worth keeping' by Henry Cloud, I've discovered one of the things that agitates me about the book so far - it seems to focus on what I (emphasis on I) can do, rather than what God can do.

I believe we do also play our part, but I also believe we should be seeking God's guidance, and talking to Him about the decisions we make, big and small. I'm guessing Elisabeth Elliot will focus more on this 'missing' aspect, and perhaps Henry will later in the book.

I do appreciate his emphasis on learning to enjoy the journey though, to relax and have fun, and to accept that this will involve taking risks. I guess I want those to be risks that I take with God, rather than on my own to simply satisfy my own desires.

Sharing life

This week has highlighted the great privilege it is to share life with friends - to be supported by some beautiful women of God.

I remember on a Vision Valley Camp with some of my best friends back in our school days, one of our leaders shared Hebrews 10:24-25 with us, about the importance of meeting together as God's people and encouraging and building each other up. This week I've seen the practical application of this verse as a number of friends have reached out to me, some without me having mentioned anything to them about what's happening in my life. An email from a good friend, a cuppa with another friend, a 'you've been on my heart' text message arriving at just the right time, and another cuppa with a great new friend who's been praying for me and the girls. I love the way God works!

It's so exciting being able to share life together, to talk about our struggles and our joys and to share what God's teaching us through all these, to think about how we can best serve Him with all He's given us, to pray for each other and to support each other so we can then reach out to others with God's love... to get into God's word together and think about it's practical application in our lives.

It occurred to me this afternoon how often we miss out on these opportunities because our lives are so busy. What a privilege to have friends, particularly friends who've been walking the journey of life a little longer, to spur us on in our walk with God. I think we need to pray for a willingness to invest in the lives of others, and for wisdom in juggling all the different priorities in life so we can make time to do this.

Laboratory of Learning

So I got sucked in to the Koorong 20% off sale - decided it'd be a good opportunity to buy a new book now that uni's finished for the year. Ended up buying both Passion & Purity (Elisabeth Elliot) and How to Get a Date Worth Keeping (Henry Cloud), which are both probably at opposite ends of the spectrum when it comes to relationships/dating. I also couldn't resist buying the latest Every Day with Jesus titled 'Soaring above the storm', I enjoy Selwyn Hughes writing and thought it'd be good to have a more directed devotional for a while.

I've started reading Cloud's book and so far my hackles are up and I'm not convinced it's going to be the world's most helpful book. But as a wise old man shared last night one of the keys as Christians is humility and being prepared to listen to other people's perspectives on God's Word and to ask God to reveal His truth to us, rather than assuming we're right. I'm not even sure what I believe when it comes to this issue anyway!

It's funny how your views change over time. Years ago I went out with a few guys just on one or two 'dates' and it was fun (mostly anyway!), though I wasn't particularly keen to develop a long-term relationship with a few of them from the start, the date/s gave me the opportunity to confirm that, rather than just writing them off. Now things are different. I guess there are less opportunities when you've got kids - a single mum probably isn't particularly desirable, if I were a guy I'd be looking and praying for a single woman who hadn't been married before and didn't have kids.

Anyhow, I digress. Many of Cloud's comments raise questions and concerns for me. He writes this pledge:

'I will date as an end in and of itself. I will not longer see dating as a place only to find a mate, but as a place to grow, experience, and serve other people. It is my new laboratory of learning, growth and experience.'

Laboratory?!!!! It sounds terrible!!!!! I guess all relationships are that to some degree, but for some reason it doesn't seem fair in a 'dating' relationship.

I'm all for growth and learning, and relationships are an important part of this, but I'm still not convinced that we should 'use' dating in this way. It sort of turns it all around as though to say it's all about me, which it shouldn't be at all. It should be about mutual enjoyment, encouragement and growth.

He also writes, 'I advised her to look at a date as an activity to get to know someone and spend time doing something fun, with no pressure.' I think this is good - being free to relax and be able to be yourself rather than having to put on some sort of dating fascade.

Cloud gives an example of a divorced woman who in his view needed to date for the sake of learning so that she could improve her ability to pick a good man, rather than jumping into a relationship where she felt 'in love'. I somehow doubt that dating would help her on this front!!! She's just as likely to fall 'in love' with the first person she dates. I'm sure it's a whole lot more complex than that.

Anyhow, I'm sure Cloud is a very wise man, I'm not meaning to give him a hard time, I'm just wanting to think carefully about his recommendations and figure out how I can best glorify God in this area of my life if there's an opportunity to in the future, which I'm hoping there will be! :)

in six months or your money back

On the topic of dating, a friend sent me a message yesterday recommending a book by Henry Cloud, 'How to get a date work keeping'. Googled the book and the caption is 'Be dating in six months or your money back'. Now that I've seen that part I'm not sure I'm so keen to read the book - yeah, I love the idea of it happening in six months if it's the right person and if that's God's timing, but I don't want to be just dating anybody for the sake of dating. My suspicion is that six months probably won't be God's timing either if the past is anything to go by.

Anyone else read this book, or Passion and Purity by Elisabeth Elliott?