I'm not alone

The more I think about it, the more I think most of us can relate to Jesus' words, "My God, my God why have You forsaken me?". One of the definitions of loneliness is "sadness resulting from being forsaken or abandoned". I think we've all experienced this feeling of being forsaken to one degree or another, we're just not often prepared to admit it.

This is a bit of a scary blog to write, but I like honesty, and I think we'd all be able to support each other much better if we were more honest with each other, and ourselves. I think the definition above of loneliness is something we can experience even when others are around us - we don't have to be completely "alone" as such to feel lonely. I've got lots of great support, but that doesn't take away my feeling of loneliness.

This afternoon Mum and I took the girls to the shops and they were both very stroppy, so we just got some meat and came straight back home. Mum said she'd take the girls to the park so that I could have a rest, but I said I wouldn't be able to rest anyway. She said I could just have a lie on the couch and a coffee, and I said I didn't want to have a coffee... after having a good old cry when I walked in the door, and reflecting on some Psalms in my Psalms Journal, I realised that I think the reason I was so upset and against the idea is that I didn't want to be alone. I think it's highlighted what I'm already feeling. Don't get me wrong, I'm so grateful to Mum for giving me a break. I'm just exploring why I responded the way I did.

But I'm not alone. Psalm 23 is a reminder that I'm not alone, though I may feel lonely, abandoned or forsaken, God is close beside me.

"The Lord is my shepherd, I have everything I need. He lets me rest in green meadows; He leads me beside peaceful streams. He renews my strength. He guides me along right paths, bringing honour to His name. Even when I walk through the dark valley of death, I will not be afraid, for You are close beside me. Your rod and Your staff protect and comfort me..."

Yeah, what an awesome Psalm.

Thank You God that You are my Strength and my Guide, that You let me rest and give me peace. Thank You that I don't need to be afraid because You're close beside me, protecting and comforting me.